The Healing Power of Pajama Pants

even the ones that don't fit

Just a quick promo spot before today’s post - I finally released “The Blingsters” audiobook! Featuring narration by me. It’s available at most of the usual places, including, hopefully, some libraries.

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The Healing Power of Pajama Pants

When I was in SoCal last month, my aunt and I put together a crafternoon at her friend’s sewing studio (a lovely, huge space built atop her garage). Elizabeth is an amazing quilter, as is her daughter Sara. Sara made this quilt for me a few years ago, to commemorate my first book, Beverley Green’s First Adventure, which used to be titled Beverley Green: Sasquatch Hunter. (Want to know why it had that title? You can find out by picking up the book for less than a buck. Want to know why I changed the title? That’s a long story but just know that some readers who were too dumb to read the blurb before buying were not happy to find out the novel was more about a neurotic middle-aged woman than an actual Bigfoot.)

sorry for the lousy photos but as a short person it's almost imossible to get a good photo of a quilt.

During our SoCal sewing afternoon, we made these cool quilted pouches. My aunt and I stopped by a few days beforehand and chose fabrics we liked, and Elizabeth quilted them up on her longarm machine. I was skeptical I’d be able to make one, but they are so easy, even I managed to do it. I had more trouble attaching the zipper mechanism than sewing the zipper onto the pouch.

I went through a sewing phase in the mid 2000s. Just small things, like cloth napkins, little business card holders, and simple bags. I love the idea of making minimalist functional items. I guess you could argue most so items are functional, but good lord, have you ever looked at the instructions to make a quilt, or even a dress?

My mom was a great sewist. She made me the cutest doll when I was little (and that’s saying a lot because I really don’t like dolls, but I will never ever give this one away). She had to learn to sew when she was little. Otherwise, she and her brothers wouldn’t have had much to wear.

At one point, maybe around 2008 or so, she helped me make a few skirts that I still have today. It was such a nice experience to sit down and do something crafty with her, both of us adults. It was a privilege to learn from her.

When she passed away in early 2011, I didn’t think I would sew again. But the desire had started to resurface lately, and I thought it would be fun to hang out with Elizabeth and Sara and Sara’s sister Erin for a sewing lesson. It was so much fun, and so satisfying to complete a project, that I vowed to continue when I got back to Oklahoma.

Finding motivation to do much of anything since I’ve been back has been hard. I’ve actually felt bad since I left Hawaii. But I pressed forward, because I had people to see and things to do. However, I was pretty miserable through it all.

Last week I finally got an appointment with my NAET practitioner. He’s a retired MD, so I really love to go see him because I get the best of both worlds – the expertise of a medical professional and the non-invasive, often just as helpful treatments of NAET.

Well, now I know what the problem is. He diagnosed me with IBS.

Hooray?

I might have picked something up in Hawaii. I don’t have anything now, but whatever it was took a toll.

I had PTSD and IBS after my mom passed away. I’ve probably always had a compromised gut biome. And there are links between Autism and gut health. Throw in an illness, add a lot of stress, and sure, it’s gonna take a toll. I’m not surprised that I’ve let my circumstances get me so out of whack. The body doesn’t lie, and if you wait too long to take care of yourself, the bigger the backlash.

So what to do about it…

The world isn’t getting any saner or nicer or cleaner or more peaceful. It is out of my control. But there are things I can do to feel better.

I can eat as well as I can (I’ve almost cut out coffee although it breaks my heart), even though there doesn’t seem to be a whole lot of rhyme or reason to what makes me feel bad, beyond the obvious things, which I avoid anyway (meat, fried stuff, processed stuff, most sweets, etc). I’m a firm believer you can fix a lot of things with diet. As they Ayurvedic saying goes, food is medicine. So I can be good to myself in this way.

And I can sew.

Two weekends ago I pulled out my sewing machine. I got it fixed over ten years ago and promptly never used again. I dug around in my closet for my supplies and found a pattern I’d bought for drawstring pants, and a piece of fabric big enough to make a pair.

I got to work.

Sewing those pants was the first time I’d felt immersed in something so stress-free in a very long time. It was the first time I let myself take some real time for myself, laundry be damned. It was the first time I shook off feelings of guilt for not doing something “more productive.” For not doing something that might result in financial gain.

And it felt great.

I totally screwed up the pants; they are unwearable. But that wasn’t really the point (well, I do need some new cotton pjs, lol). I studied the pattern and tried to understand the steps, and figured out how to do it. Then I figured out that I’d figured it out wrong, but I don’t care.

The next weekend I got my machine out and tried again, this time following a tutorial I found online. The second pair of pajama pants is also unwearable, but for a different reason. They do fit better than the first pair, but they’re still not “it.” But again, that wasn’t really the point. Again, I got lost in the process, and I disconnected from stress and the news and my to do list. I can feel some of the tension unwinding. I have a long way to go, but it’s progress.

You better believe I’m going to try a third pair. Maybe they will even be wearable.

i learned how to make buttonholes! and yes, they look like scrubs. i used the cheapest fabric i could find, assuming i’d mess up, lol

There are other things I’m doing to get better, I’ll talk more about that next time.

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